So, we're waiting on Leila to make her grand entrance. I'm due on Saturday, but I'm not expecting anything. With Hollis I went to 41w and 3d and that's as far as she would let me, then he STILL didn't want to come out and they had to cut him out. So, we'll see if she's as stubborn as him. I've been doing pretty good, but I'm starting to get impatient.(Insert prayer for me here) ;)
    This past couple of weeks has been rough. First, my grandfather decided after 49 years of marriage that he no longer wanted to be with my grandmother and left. Talk about something you didn't see coming!! I am fortunate enough that I haven't had to deal with divorce in my life, and let me tell you I'm not sure how to. Then I got a phone call that my lifelong best friend's brother had been killed. What?!  Then, Dane had a doctor's appointment this week because his hip has been giving him trouble for about a year and the potential diagnosis was shocking and not good. He has an MRI coming up to confirm the diagnosis. I'll post more about that when we know more.This week has been filled with trying to understand God's timing and finally giving up because He's the master and we don't have to understand. So, anyway, my faith is really being tested between all of this and waiting on Leila. But the truth is, I feel like I can handle it better now then I could have a year ago.These things are the good that has come out of these stressful situations: I feel like we've made some really good, lifelong friends recently. In the past, Dane and I haven't handled stress well in our relationship, but this time we are doing well. God has shown me the progress being made in all the important relationships in my life. What a blessing.

    I'm sitting in my chair, it's 8:00 in the morning, Hollis is doing his "sleepy song" in bed (he has done this since he was six months old, he rocks and hums, it's how he gets to sleep and wakes up.), and I'm just realizing, there will not be many more days like this. Soon Leila will have gotten me up long before Hollis does. I look at that before me and smile. What joy our children bring us. Even in the hard times. Even when your body is begging for just one more hour of sleep. Remember that feeling? So tired, but wishing your newborn would wake up so you can see them again. I think that is how God see us. Well, aside form the exhausted part. Wishing that we would open our eyes to spend more time with him. Not wanting us to lose our childlike innocence. Relying fully on him. In fact, being helpless without him. I'm working on that. It's so hard to separate God's reality from society. Society tells me that I can do anything I want to. It also tells me that the only thing that matters is my happiness. This is the opposite of the truth. We should be diving head first into the plans that he has for us. The problem is that now we have to listen so much harder because this world has become so corrupt. We can barely hear his whisper above the shouting of society. Listen closely though. He's still there. He's never gone. He's still waiting for us to open our "newborn" eyes to spending time with him.